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Citt and Bumpkin (1680)
written by "Rahn, B. J."
...f your Instructions to procure Informations of this quality. Bum. I'le fit you to a hair for that matter: But then I must be running up and down ye know, into Taverns, and Coffee-houses, and thrusting myself into Meetings, and Clubs. That licks mony. Citt. Never trouble your self for that, you shall be well paid and your expences born: Beside so much a head from the State, for every Priest that you discover. Bum. Well! these Priests and Jesuites are damn'd fellows. Citt. And yet let me tell you Bumpkin, a bare fac'd Papist is not half so bad as a Papist in Masquerade. Bum. Why what are those I prethee? Church worse to Dissenters then Jesuites. Citt. They are your Will-worship-men, your Prelates Brats: Take the whole Litter of 'um, and you'l finde never a barrel better Herring. Let me tell thee in Love Bumpkin, these Curs are forty times worse to Us then the Jesuits themselves; for the One is an Open Enemy, the Other lies gnawing like a Canker in our Bowells. And then being train'd up to Latin and Greek, there's no opposing of the Power of Godlinesse to the Sophistry of Human Reason: Beside that, the Law is For us in the One Case, and Against us in the Other. Bum. Which way shall we go to work then, to deal with this Generation of Men? Citt. We must joyn the Wisdom of the Serpent, to the Innocence of the Dove; and endeavour to compass that by stratagem, which we cannot gain by Argument. But now am I going to open a Mistery to thee, that's worth—— Bum. Prethee the Worth on't Citt: For talk is but talk, the Worth is the Main point. Citt. Why then let me tell thee Bumpkin, the Mistery that I am about to disclose to thee, was worth to our Predecessours not long since, no less then Three Kingdoms, and a better penny. But I'le seal your Lips up, before I stir one step further. Bum. Why look ye Citt, may this Drink never go thorough me, if ever blab one Syllable of any thing thou tell'st me as a Secr...

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